Sunday, October 5, 2008

Maintenance: TEN COMMANDMENTS OF BLOGGING

(Thou shall obey?)


Charlton Heston kicking ass as Moses in The Ten Commandments*


In spite of the rampant immaturity running throughout this blog, I am intending for this to be a (semi-) professional blog.* Blogging is a necessity today for any journalist (even though journalists insist its not journalism...so whatever). And for me this is a learning experience, along with a way to write about stupid things I've done in London.

So with that I present to you the 10 Commandments of Blogging. My goal for the future of this blog is to obey these commandments and to stop coveting my neighbor's wife and donkey.

For the sake of improving this blog, here we go (rated A-F):

1. Make your opinion known.

Great success?*: (B) I think so. For example, how do I feel about Stonehenge? (Everyone: It sucks!) Plus, I'm rating plays and other adventures. My opinion - it's out there.

2. Link like crazy.

Great success?: (A) Heck yes, if there's one skill I have in life it's linking like crazy to strangely entertaining things.

3. Write less.

Great success?: (D+) No, I'm horrible at it. Every knows that if there's two things I fail at in life it's writing concisely and curling. I hope to fix my writing problem through this blog, and my curling problem in Oslo, Norway.

4. 250 words is enough.

Great success?: (D+) I just mentioned I'm horrible at this. These commandments obviously suck at this, too. Isn't this the same thing as No. 3?

5. Make headlines snappy.

Great success?: (B+) I think my headlines have a certain wit to them. I mean, who wouldn't want to read a headline called "Par-taaaay" or "BBC."

6. Include bullet point lists.

Great success?: (C-) Well, hmmm there's this post. And I've started to make my Snatch'd reviews in a more bullet point/quick hits form. But there needs to be more.

7. Edit your posts.

Great success?: (B+) I feel I've done a decent job of editing for the most part. Not perfect, and of course some of the formatting problems have to do with the fact blogspot sucks.

8. Make your posts easy to scan.

Great success?: (B-) Well, my writing is easy to get through usually. But the posts should be shorter, list-ier, and include more photos.

9. Be consistent with your style

Great success?: (C+) I try to, but once again I blame this on blogspot sucking.

10. Little post with keywords.

Great success?: (F) I'm not too clear on what this means. So I guess I fail at it.

Two other commandments I'd like to amend.
-Lotsa photos
-Strong design
-Post (almost) every damn day

Both those elements are a work in progress. Oh and look bullet points!

Well, there ya have it. Whaddya think...thou shall obey?

--
Foot notes

*The Ten Commandments used to scare the bejeesus out of me as a kid. Now it ranks as the third scariest movie I've ever seen behind Saw and Ghostbusters II.

*Haven't you ever wondered why this blog contains so few swear words and other vulgarities when I curse like a sailor in real life? You were wondering, weren't you?

*Hmm, this is easily the most vulgar thing I've ever linked to on my blog. But it's frikkin' Borat and the movie-version made $100+ million in America. Anyway, just skip to the last minute for the amazing line that gives the link its name.

4 comments:

StephenD said...

That part about write less is false. Good writing is good writing.

Listen to Halsey. He will teach you how to eat and clothe yourself. I expect you to be a normal functioning human being when you get back.

Anonymous said...

10 commandments of blogging? There's commandments for everything now, aren't there?

Ghostbusters II. Indeed, very scary.

You are doing a good job with the blog, for the record.
I'd also say that you should concentrate more on the other commandments than on making each post "X" # of words or less.
Obviously, you don't want them to be too long, but if it's just over 250 words, like say 280, who cares?!

Unknown said...

Matt, forget the vote. Root for Fulham. Go to Craven Cottage and see a game. You will not be able to afford a ticket to Arsenal or Chelsea, and West Ham is in a dire situation so far. Fulham are a fun team, they have a history of American players (incl. Clint Dempsey currently), and they're cheaper to see live. Go do it.

Matt said...

Thanks, these were three excellent comments. (I mean, all comments are excellent, but I felt these in particular should be lauded).